heyy people... its been a gruelling 2 days of school... the third hasnt started yet... bloging at 5am!!.. haha... bleh... its been blow after blow after blow straight into my weary face... im coming in and out of contemplating quitting this jc life and going into a poly life.. till now im still totally unsure... im still totally shaken... i dont know what to do.. what to tell my parents.. how to face my grandparents... i seriously dont know... i need THE LORDS grace power and mercy.. i really do...
im turning in and out of emotional breakdowns... everytime i get a result... my face frowns... it is always a worrying moment for me... i didnt want this to happen i really didnt... but i assure you that i have changed.. shed my old skin and into a new more hardworking me.. and as long as i stay in this jc system.. ill work long and hard to reach that goal.. sleep as little as 3 hours if i have to...i always feel its pointless sometimes this education system... giving all the students so much stress... so much pressure... as my lao shi once said... "this is the time when you face the improbable in life.. so why make it harder... puberty is already as hard a process as it looks.. " and im in total agreement...
i guess life isnt that great if you're wondering whats this dude blabbering on about... i cant face life in that carefree viewpoint anymore.. whatever happens ill always be a million steps behind...why... i also dont know... its just puzzling to see the effort put in the subject i love most.. or rather presumably love most.. fall into nothing when recieve my results.. ive learnt the hard way.. ive learnt the tough way... ive learnt that for everything you really want you have to go all out or die in the process... i think im the latter dying in the process... but ill make this revival i promise you all... I PROMISE...
i thank all my friends who have been with me through all this.. comforted me...assuring me... helping me... telling me its normal...telling me never to give up... my 1s18 classmates for being there... (laurel regina peiling) =)... to shermaine for being that guiding light... to cookie monster for always never failing to make me smmmilleee... to fabien who always has been a heart warmer.. to bry who alwasy is the best comforter... to sasha for all her luke warm jokes.. and to all the yfers who cared... THANK YOU... you all really made me and my day better... you guys rock and will forever be the best... =)
so till another time everyone.. GOD BLESS AND KEEP SMILING =))
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