Where got time?

I miss writing and honestly I miss this space I once used so often to rant about things in life, though insignificant to other meant so much to me. Once in a while i get the urge to write and i jot them down in a notebook of random thoughts and ramblings, but often than not I don't find a space as conducive as this to pour out my thoughts.

I'm sure many will say that blogging is a has-been celebrity of the past and twitter is now the new in thing to rant your thoughts. Honestly, the 200 word limit is hindering and I don't like to put my thoughts in summary. I simply don't have the habit or find the joy in posting little thoughts onto my wall when I feel like it, because honestly I don't think I ever have felt like it. I always felt that this was a great space and I go to it much less often only because there is so much more in my life.

I've been in ns for 7 months now and time seems to fly by so fast. I remember it like it was yesterday that I first embarked on this unknown phase in my life, and here I am already witnessing a quarter of it pass me by. Loads have happened in my life over these months and I've learned a lot through it all. Coping with workload of studying and other commitments have really put a strain both mentally and physically on me but i guess we all just have to learn to hang in there and cope. You know what they all say, what doesn't kill you only makes you stronger.

Time is such an abstract art, like a sudden torrential storm on a sunny day, you'll never know what to expect. You may think you know what is in store for your in the future, even the near future. But life likes to spring surprises on you to keep you on your feet, i found. And in trying to get a grip on life, more often than not we loose our inner senses and our sanity in trying to catch up.

I don't know about everyone out there, but while in a different phase in life, a lot of things tend to fade away and sadly friendships start to erode. But some friends that mean most to you you'll try to hang on to and not let them get washed away with the sweeping changes in your life. I miss the times in jc where i was always surrounded by people that genuinely cared for me and i for them. In life's road trip you tend to loose people along the way, but these bunch of great friends have stuck and we still meet up, albeit only once in a while to catch up. I'm honored to have such great friends that keep up the effort and sincerely, these are the friends i would trust everything I have with.

Then there are friends which you get to know in a phase in your life and just fade into the background because you weren't close, or, not one of you bothered to make the effort to try. These are friends that often you find joy on the surface hanging out with them, but beyond that, you don't know them all too well. I'm saddened when relationships fade and those that once were close to you almost suddenly turned acquaintances.

Now I'm in a phase in life where I've made many great new friends, some better than the others. Whether these relationships can stand the test of time is another matter altogether. Only time will tell.

In one blog post I've poured all that was lingering in my mind these past few days. Thoughts that I wanted to share and life experiences that left a deep impression on my life.

An update on my not so happening life:
I've taken classes part time, a diploma in law (it really is difficult)and am still putting my braincells to work.

Life has been pretty good to me so far thank God

I have an awesome ukele (thank you mum and dad)

I'm going to UK at the end of october!! woohoo :D

Attempts to live healthy have been pretty successful, I'm running two times a week to train for the nike human race in october and the singapore stand chart marathon in december

The heart is a stubborn creature

As humans, we know that when we do something wrong, our conscience pricks us like a needle and we know that we need to stop only because we care for ourselves and our personal well being. But honestly, deep within our hearts we know we don't know our limits, neither will we ever know our limits when it comes to things we so deeply want in our lives that such sacrifices seem almost logical. On hindsight, we may come to deeply regret the things we do in life, but honestly, don't you feel better making these mistakes and learning from them or constantly keeping so cautiously close to yourself and wary that life is not meaningful anymore. It's a cruel give and take and reality bites but all we got to do is to move on. All we have in us is a will so strong, that even when we step out of our comfort zones we still can survive. Even when you think life is down and in the dumps, keeping a half glass full attitude makes like all the more worthwhile.

For those who feel down in the dumps at times and don't know what to do in life.

I've decided to turn to my blog today just because I chanced upon it and read my thoughts in the past. Most of it bleak and 'emo' as they call it in modern teen lingo. I found myself wallowing in self pity at the things that have passed and didn't go as I like and not dwelling instead on the blessings that God has granted me with. I feel like a complacent little brat. Times have changed and my attitude to everything has changed for the better. I'm living the life more ever since and I have to thank christianity in most part of this process. I honestly don't ever think I was christian enough in my hay days, though I'm only 20, and hay days seem like im 40. The past seems distant and moving on and closure is what i need.

Moving on from such reflection to pure joy that i'm trying to live my life to the fullest.


David Choi- By My Side

Which brings me to this sweet video that Wong fu productions just made together with the brilliant david choi. He's such a brilliant musician and such a lyrical genius. It made me reminisce about so many things, but the desire and love exubarated here reminded me so much of how i used to feel for a certain someone. (zulu alert in that vid :D)

Like a flying helium balloon, I didn't know you would catch me in flight and bring me back down to earth.

Till another day,

I'm starting to love writing again.

I haven't posted in what seems like forever!

It's already June the 21st and time has been speeding by like a bullet train. A lot of things in my life have changed over the past month and life is heading in a new exciting direction, I can only pray that God will be with me every step of the way.

Today, with what I can best express myself, in words, i'm back ranting about the happenings of life.

I JUST CAME BACK FROM DAVID CHOI'S CONCERT!

Yes, the one and only david choi.

I haven't been to many concerts lately, but I have to say it was well worth the money. The songs that he sung today never fail to make me wonder time and again why he's still not as recognized as he's supposed to be. Maybe he hit a heart string(or two) on a few of the songs he sang but the texture in his songs that he composed and the unique tone to his voice really makes him stand out among the millions of artists on youtube. He has such a gentle, humorous and friendly disposition and even a person who used to sit on the fence captivated by some songs was deeply entrenched into his whole list of songs. I leave the concert amazed by the talent of this man, and how youtube has made him such a hit even on a tiny island like singapore.

Below are a few of my personal favourites:

That Girl- David Choi


The Way You Are- David Choi and Kinna Grannis


By My Side- David Choi

I know that it's hard to think that a youtube artist and not a multi platinum artist would be on my list of favorites in my ipod playlist. But honestly, he sings from the heart and how many artists today have sunk into the depths of composing around beats that have effect on people and thinking of how to get into the top of radio charts. Music has to come from the heart and i think he is every bit as good as anyone out there.

After today, I can't be more sure than I am now.

Seriously, if you still don't know who he is, please check the man out :)

I have neglected this sacred space of mine for a long time and now long cob webs are starting to stream across what once was a hobby of mine. I still crave to write and find passion in words that can express my feelings but I've found that second nature to my new found love for Youtube and Music. I frequently scour my subscriptions and find joy in covers and renditions so dynamic, it makes the song sound so new and noncommercial. And then I found out that once not quite so long ago, this was my avenue to pour out my grievances, to document my life that has passed me by so i can look at the archives in the future and smile at my colorful past. I wonder what's gotten into me that I have neglected blogger or that I've found another avenue to express myself, but the form of words to express never ceases to amaze me.

This election, as the election fever heightens, I know I am only 20 years of age and ineligible to vote in the coming elections, but I've found so much interest in the debates and passion that's come to pass that I find myself wandering into this uncharted world of politics. I never have been a fan of politics and the political scene often sighting boredom as a reason never to look at such an issue. But as the elections draw nearer I find myself captivated by the speakers both of the ruling party and opposition parties in Singapore. Singapore has come a long way since the slums of its past and broke past its status quo as a fishing village into the sprawling metropolis we see today. As far as I've known in my 20 years living on this island that we live and breathe by the rules which govern us and prevent us from a certain way of life. Though that may not have sounded much unrest and resentment before, opposition movements have now rose up like a sudden tide culminating beneath our peaceful waters attempting to rid the nation of its supposed strangle hold. This election, the fact that I'm not of age to vote gives me reason to view both opposition and the ruling government in a fair light and not with renewed vigor and anger to a certain cause. I find that tug rope is now pulled more forcefully that ever and the voters don't know which side to choose because both claim to be for the good of Singapore. I for one know that it may really be time for change in this country, that even though we may be living comfortable lives right now that complacency has robbed this country of what is truly achievable. Still I find this year's elections so compelling that if I were to be a voter especially in hotly contested areas like Aljunied i would be so torn between the lines that I wouldn't know what to do.

One thing I've found out over the past weeks, that politics brings out the side of people that no one has known and as these true colors show can the people know whose side they stand and which they feel best to lead the country.

I know this may be such a random rant about politics but I think I've just poured out the ramblings of what has been going on in my mind for the past few days. That's what blogs are for now isn't it :)

When life tears you apart

HELLO WORLD, I realised I haven't been blogging for a long time now and it's the time of day when I usually have the mood to blog. On sunday nights when the weekends have just ended and another new week starts to dawn on me. Life is unpredictable these days and the times when we feel like it's going to be a bad day can actually turn good.

The news headlines reek of ominous disasters and calamities, war and gore and power struggles. We in Singapore should feel extremely blessed that we are a country that doesn't get knocked around by the ebb and flow of nature nor are we one that is a ticking time bomb of political unrest waiting to explode into a full scale blood bath. It's in perilous times like these when I feel happy to be part of this safe haven in Singapore. While the world around us folds over and crumbles into pieces, our little red dot has triumphed from adversity into a force to be reckoned with. Do we really have to make mountains out of molehills? Can't we all just be satisfied with what we have and how safe this island is? I guess human nature is as such, we will never be satisfied with the things we have. My heart goes out to all the quake shaken countries of japan, myanmar and even china. Also those in the highly volatile regions that are ongoing so much strife and uncertainty. We live our lives on this sunny island without the constant fear a hurricane may rip our roof off our heads or the sound of bullets buzzing by our windows. WE SHOULD BE THANKFUL.

Many have claimed this marks the coming of the end times and that the world is coming more and more to the horrific end that is described quite graphically in the book of revalations. I for one think that it's not up to us to predict the future or up to us to know when it all ends. Though we thrive on certainty and predictability in certain ways so that we won't make future mistakes, we are not and will never be God. So let's just not get too ahead of ourselves now.

Enough of all the serious and doomsday news.

Now on to my "exciting" life! :D

I have been officially posted out of BMT and the first week was a blast. People have been awesomely friendly and the working atmosphere makes time speed by in a blast. I really feel blessed being posted here and I have nothing but gratitude for the Lord. :)

You know I'm a youtube fanatic, constantly scouring through my subscriptions for great music of funny videos.

The cave- Mumford and Sons (Jake Coco)
This week I stumbled upon this man here, Jake coco. I haven't heard mumford and sons music yet and from the way this guy covered the song, I became an instant fan.

Yes the weekends are over so quickly. I guess when they say times passes when you're having fun, it really is true. Periodically I look to check at my calender and would believe we're already almost at the end of march. This year has been amazingly quick so far and I just hope that it won't fly past without me enjoying as much of the process as I can.

On a much sentimental and random note. Recently, I've been thinking a lot lately of that special someone that I've fallen head over heels with in the past. The messages that we recently exchanged and how it would be like to have someone to love again.Ignore how naiive i am right now, my emotions are messing with my mind

TILL ANOTHER DAY PEOPLE, GOD BLESS AND KEEP ON SMILING!

Platoon of Platoon 2

Platoon 2 it's been a great one month and come to think of it, it's sped by somehow. Now that our BMT is finally over and we're posted to new units to meet new people in a new environment, i must say i'm going to miss everyone in this great platoon and the memory we shared throughout these 4 weeks. I'll never forget and even turned sentimental on the last day when we all parted our ways and exchanged numbers while wondering what our new environment will be like. The last bus ride where we were all high and cheering our way out to yet tee mrt. Throughout these 4 weeks, i've made many dear friends and formed friendships that i'm sure will last. Though we're now in our new units, im pretty sure we'll stay in contact and we'll meet up soon. The laughter, joy and fun we had here was fun while it lasted. I leave with happy memories of a great platoon of great people from all walks of life. BETTER GET OUT OF OUR WAY NOW, BEFORE WE ROLL ALL OVER YOU!

Hopefully, new unit life will be great. I'll find out soon enough.


Pretty Eyes- Alex Goot
You and your pretty eyes keep me alive, they keep me alive. I've been listening a lot to this song from alex goot and i find that they describe how i still feel of you. Every time I face obstacles or feel troubled, your pretty eyes never fail to keep me alive and up all night. I just wish the feelings are mutual.

The weekends have been great so far. Spent the entire weekends with my family and I must say that the weekends zoom by way to fast. Now monday is looming and once again the routine starts. I only hope i'll find life better.

TILL ANOTHER DAY PEOPLE!GOD BLESS AND KEEP ON SMILING!

My heart goes out to all in Japan. After looking at the terrible scenes unfolding in front of me on my laptop while living in the comfortable environment called Singapore, you start to realize how blessed we all are. All my heart felt prayers to everyone suffering in the crisis and even those countries affected but the after shock tsunami in the pacific basin. I just hope that everything will turn out fine and God willing this chain of incidents plaguing 2011 will come to an end and the year will turn out better for all of humanity.

When I look at the challenges faced by the other countries, I've come to realize how great our little red dot is, always unfazed and moving along the economic ladder. Though not all of us may be multi millionares, we all at least have a roof over our heads we consider home. When we look at other countries that are in turmoil either politically or naturally plagued by natural disasters, we will know and appreciate how comfortable we are and complaining will only seem naiive and ignorant. When things happen do we appreciate the things we take for granted in life, that's human nature.

These few days have got me thinking, especially the trip to the changi war memorial museum. I really felt how the POW's struggled in times of adversity and trial and really evoked a lot of emotion within me. At times we feel life is so mundane and only like to do what seems like a tradition, to complain, but when you know that someone has it worse off than you only do you keep quiet and count your blessings. If people were to appreciate how awesome life is, we wouldn't be dreading life right now would we.


Chris Medina- What Are Words
This song is one of the most heart felt songs I've ever heard, especially coming from a man like Chris Medina. These are the songs that pull your heart strings and unknowingly even though you don't find yourself touched, in your heart you'll be bawing your eyes out. Listen to the lyrics of this song and find that every single word is so beautifully crafted, simple yet have so much deep meaning.

Ask yourself this, " What are words if you really don't mean them when you say them, what are words if they're only for good times then they're gone" "they live on even when they're gone"

If you love someone, do you tell them lies and deceive them from the truth or do you mean them when you say them, those three words I LOVE YOU.

You know friends, I've learned to get over the results now and thank all my close friends for being such concerned beacons of light in my life when it seemed all was dark. I thank every single person for picking me up in my sad moments and getting me back on my feet again. Especially the Lord for His constant inspiration and grace in my life that has once again brought me out of pessimism, because I always fine comfort in the knowledge that He's there, always.

These few weeks have passed by very fast in camp and soon will be the passing out. I've made so many friends here in my platoon that I feel will last a lifetime. Met so many unexpected people in my life that i thought i never would have met. Most importantly, through these 4 weeks we all have bonded like no other and I would have to say, all this coming to a close is really making me all the more sentimental. :) platoon 2 pals, you made this journey a great one.

TILL ANOTHER DAY PEOPLE! GOD BLESS AND KEEP ON SMILING!

the a level results, now my mine is in a mess

I have to thank all my friends for being so concerned about today and for all the well wishes from everyone. I feel that today in my eyes was disappointing results wise. I expected to do better honestly, but I have comfort in the knowledge that God has his plan for me and whatever the plan may be, I know that it's in our best interest because of His unfailing love for us.

Nerve wrecking as the final moments ticked down on the clock and the rain poured before we went over to collect our results. My heart was literally in my mouth and I was suffering badly from the case of jitters. I lit up though when I saw that our batch of JC2's did the improbable again, we beat the odds and defied all the predictions made and once again did more than expected of us. 71 points was the mean average score in my school for the graduating class of 2010 and I feel part to be among that legacy. The school has a special place in my heart and if not for the dedication of the special bunch of teachers in SRJC I wouldn't even be sure where I would be today. The time when we had to gather at the table one by one to sign our results, dampened by the fact that our CT didn't come to deliver the news made me worry. When I collected the results in my mind was calm and serene because I knew that I couldn't do anything about it no more I just had to accept it, good or bad.

Slowly pulling the paper from behind the testimonial I saw:
GP- B
Hist- D
Math- C
Chem- E
Econs- B

My mind could only flash blanks, because this was the worst case scenario for me to be in. In my mind, I couldn't face the music.

Even though this is the highest rank points I've ever attained in my JC life, thoughts of doubts surfaced today that I've never had thought of before. I was an emotional wreck right after the results.

Now come to think of it, I feel that the results I have isn't that bad at all. I now know what to do in life and the things I actually am good at. God has pointed and narrowed down the path of my life to these routes and I think help my indecisive mind decide. SO PRAISE THE LORD.

Still, I thank all those who have comforted me, taught me, studied with me, gave me advice and made life in SRJC the best 3 years of my life. :) I leave this school, awed by how it has changed me for the better.

TOMOROW IS THE DAY!

Dear friends who are taking the A level results tomorrow it is D-Day, Judgement Day, THE DAY HAS FINALLY ARRIVED. I have not been so nervous over any result besides those that will come tomorrow ever in my life. I know I've tried my best and I know that I shouldn't be too nervous about it all, but I'm only human, anxiety is only a natural reaction to events as important as this. I always have imagined myself one day waiting my fate over a slip of paper that means the world to me, but I never thought this day could come sooner. It seemed liked yesterday when the A levels ended, now the results are out and I have to face the music. I just hope tomorrow's music will be one of great jubilant joy for our school.

I remember the day very vividly, the day when I had to go to school for the O level results. Butterfly's were flying rapidly around in that stomach of mine and the wait for the results one by one was so excruciating that it just felt like eternity.

Now that I'm older, I still feel the same way. Except that now I know that the Lord has a plan and no matter what the result I'm sure there is a purpose good or bad. Faith is all that's keeping me afloat at this juncture of time, seemingly tired but not able to get to sleep. Faith is what has me pushing on through the toughest of times during the A's and faith kept me hanging on. So now more than ever, when I can't do anything about it, I'll leave it to the hands of God

TO ALL THOSE FRIENDS, CHURCH FRIENDS, JC FRIENDS, PLATOON MATES TAKING THE A LEVEL RESULTS, I WISH EVERYONE NOTHING BUT THE BEST. WE KNOW WE'VE GIVEN IT OUR ALL, IT'S NOT IN YOUR HANDS NOW, SO HAVE A LITTLE FAITH WON'T YOU. COME WHAT MAY

I write not for the fame or for the recognition, I write because I'm passionate about it.

ITS ALREADY FEBRUARY THE 27TH! It's an unearthly time of morning to blog but I slept earlier and I feel wide awake now to do a post. :)

Life with literally no hair is SURREAL. Yes, I look at myself differently in the mirror now and it has taken a while to get used to the lack of hair. The good thing about so little hair is the little maintainance that you have to go through with it and the time you spend in the bathroom naturally becomes less. Army life has been awesome so far, only because I'm a PES E recruit and everything seems fine and dandy. Week one in army seemed to pass by very quickly and I think with God's grace before I know it, so will the rest of the week till the end of BMT. Reporting to Yew Tee before so early in the morning means my sleeping habits of old have to change, but it seems I've finally adapted to the reality of this changing habit. It's interesting to say the least interacting with people in the platoon because we come from all sorts of different backgrounds and characters and being recruits in pes e, many different ailments, so it's a sheer test of your human interaction skills. I'm quite happy being in platoon 2 now, the people there try their best to be friendly and not go overboard with the noise making when it comes to times when we have to be serious, you can't ask for more than that. THANK GOD FOR BLESSING ME THROUGH THIS WEEK!

When you have to count your blessings in life, most people fall short and actually turn to the other side of the coin. My psychology in life is always to stay optimistic in all circumstances and while I may be back at home everyday seeing my family and having a good sleep on my bed, many in tekong are at their wits end waking up at 4 am in uncomfortable beds and doing pushups like it's breathing fresh air, I know I'm having a better life.

A LEVEL RESULTS ARE OUT NEXT FRIDAY! :O SO FAST?! Word has been going around for so long now that the a level results are out next week and I have been thinking about it for the whole week in times of stoning and free time. One slip of paper that could determine my whole future is probably the most nerve wrecking thing that I've ever received my entire life, it really means everything.

I thank all my friends in church who have kept me in their prayers constantly and I've been well for the whole week so thank God for keeping me safe. Life has been nothing short of great, so remember that while you may think you're suffering, someone has it a lot worse off than you do.

TILL ANOTHER DAY, GOD BLESS AND KEEP ON SMILING!!

MANU 4-0, POWER PACK :D